IN SUMMARY MOTHERFUCKERS:
Marshall: You seem… Something.
Mary: Dazzling? Brilliant? Batgirl meets Tomboy? A Jane Austen hero in a John Grisham world?
Marshall: Breezy. What’s going on?
Mary: Look, why does something have to be going on? What’s with everyone looking for signs and deeper meaning? I don’t know. I don’t know. It’s been a brutal year. I think I just need to blow off some steam, you know? Jinx has been on me for weeks, pushing me to go on vacation like she’s got some stake in Orbitz.
Marshall: That’s ridiculous.
Mary: That’s Jinx. I don’t know. Maybe I should just pick a bar, down some shots, and do some cowboy.
Mary: What? What’s, “Uh-huh”?
Marshall: If you feel like you need to get something out of your system… If you need to go do some cowboy…
Marshall: You’ve done the cowboy. And when you weren’t doing the cowboy, you were the cowboy, like with Raph. You don’t need to let off steam. What you need is… I get that you don’t like messy. But maybe messy is what you need. Maybe instead of just anyone, you should be looking for someone. Someone who challenges you. Who calls you on your BS and gets in your face and makes you think. What?
Mary: What? I’m thinking.
Favorite Mary/Marshall moments - 03x13 A Priest Walks Into A Bar
whyyyyy can’t she figure it ou-hou-hout
so let’s talk about this for a second - mary is not normally a touchy feely person. she lives on dry sarcasm and not to say that she doesn’t care about marshall but most of the time spent between the two is spent arguing and bickering (like an old married couple - but more about that later) but she touches his face to make sure he’s okay she asks him if he’s okay and then touches his face you guys - this show will be the death of me
Reblog because tags.
Marshall: I feel like I’m the keeper of this exotic animal and I spend my time either protecting you from the world or the world from you. And it’s just… it’s just a lot of responsibility.
Mary: I’m sorry, but that’s your job. And you cannot quit.
Marshall: Your witness is on the run with her daughter and fugitive husband. You really felt this was the best time to grab a slurpee?
Mary: I was waiting for Beth for 20 minutes at a 7-11. What am I, a robot?
Marshall: Robots are more sensitive.
Favorite Mary/Marshall moments - 04x04 Meet The Shannons
Mary: What? Are you serious? You dragged my ass down three flights and halfway across town for dork recess? Get him a slide-rule and a Rubik’s cube, and call me in the morning.
Marshall: Patience, grasshopper.
Mary: Suck it, Sensei.
Favorite Mary/Marshall moments - 04x09 The Rolling Stones
Mary: I can’t believe I’m pregnant.
Marshall: No, you can’t and yes, you are.
Mary: I’m not sure I know how to do this.
Marshall: Just like you said, treat it like a witness. Protect, relocate. We’ll make a list. You like lists.
Mary: I do like lists.
Marshall: I’ll draw up a template tomorrow with “locate nearest restroom” on every other line.Favorite Mary/Marshall moments - 04x07 I’m A Liver Not A Fighter
Marshall: We’re having a baby, Mary.
Mary: Oh, we are?
Marshall: I’m with you every day— if you’re having a baby, trust me, we’re having a baby.
Mary: Fine, whatever. Just get back to me when you need three jog-bras to run to the phone.Favorite Mary/Marshall moments - 04x07 I’m A Liver Not A Fighter